Look, Mortensen!
Your Greenbook movie may not have won you an award,
But your KFC moment made it to Beijing!
Our little scurry around the world
With various leaders taking sides
Over a ridiculous land border dispute
President Xi from China
Arrived in Moscow to speak to President Putin
And so did a massive order of the Colonels infamous chicken
Whom do you imagine flew these guys
To Moscow? Or do they still have a KFC?
All the Mac Donalds have been shut down.
Maybe that was the problem
No Big Macs were available!
Well, someone got more than Chow mien
Those bags must have contained
Side orders of corn on the cob
And mash potatoes with gravy
No one goes into a restaurant.
And just orders the main course.
Wonder Mr. Mortensen
If Vladimir got his fingers greasy
Eating your Kentucky fried Chicken?
What else can we believe...
Certainly, Xi shared at least one of those bags
After all he got special ordered ice cream
As his treat from Putin which he brought with him
Best Friends in the east
Must keep each other in good
On those forbidden western delights.
Good thing you are not politically inspired
With all you acclaim
And Academy nomination.
Some actors pull a lot of punch
Out of just one scene
Others just go on blithy
With their little award
Gently sitting it down
To view and consider
How much more work
They need to do next time.
Then there are the Jims of the world
I remember Merv Griffin
Could not get the kid from showing up
All the time on his show
He asked him one night
What are you famous for?
He was famous for not being famous
Or not having done anything at all.
Except be on his fathers show his entire life.
But that was not good enough for him.
He had to start showing up on park benches
Like in an old spy movie
Just waiting for the woman with the buggy
To go by him with the little girl
Whose face was on the Gerber can
He is so easily obsessed about things
A sweet little award to a woman
Whose mother was well known
While she had waited too long
To get married to her childhood sweetheart
Who came home from the Korean war
They had bad luck the first time
A dead born resulting in a court case
Then a few years later a miracle
Which was given a small cameo
For the sake of the woman
Who was already having a breakdown
From enduring the emotion of bringing a life
Into the world.
She could not go to any park
It seemed without the little monster showing up
It ruined her day
And put fear into her mother.
Who was he and why was he stalking therm.
I never have figured out who the woman
Was who pointed him in our direction
But he has never stopped harassing us
Even taking our name for himself
He raided all of our homes and bank accounts
With his parents gone he has ridden into
Hollywood as if he is an achiever
Instead of a liar
Telling everyone he is someones manager
Not allowed with out his permission
We have gone to court
He has been told he is not my husband
As well as my manager
He wont stop acting as if he has good
Intentions towards me
But instead enjoys himself
At others expense
Which is why he is court ordered
To see a psychologist every day
Instead has given people the impression
He is a doctor which they somehow believe.
Now not a single place has not been raided.
Nor any items left remaining
But they show up in the most amazing places
Recently this place that has given me a roof
But not personal freedom
Was giving out bags of clothes to everyone
I looked at mine
And inside were clothes
I remember buying some time ago
Old Navy is a standby
And their stuff does not go out of style.
There were many items inside.
It is odd how a non profit organization
Has so many flaws in it
They have strict policies
About privacy and yet wont stop
The constant barrage of information
That passes on to other clients
Who are sitting around and acting
As if they are going to devour you
Alice is one of those from the old days
I remember her father when he showed up
A German American who brought home
An Italian wife with problems
Half of her kids are blonde like him
And then there are the few who are retarded.
I remember Jimmy being very friendly with this family
He got upset about the retarded Alice
Screaming and calling down hell upon us
He always went into one of his maniacs mode
When he wanted his way
They now control most of the old places
Up north but still show up south
Wanting more and more
While Alice cant get out of my face
If I find my face on her phone
I am going to send her to prison
I have told her repeatedly
Not to photograph me but still she does
I don't care what they want
We signed agreements for no pictures to be taken
We also signed that no outsiders would have access
To our rooms and yet he has been here
I also understand my suitcases are up for grabs
If anything should happen to me.
I can hear Candace talk about me
His best friend
Any death certificate that come out
Will have her name on it.
But which husband should we list?
She has had so many of them
And as for Jimmy his real name
Will have to be used
And his cause of death
With be decapitation
How else are we going to get his mouth
To stop speaking
I can still feel him talking
To me even when he is not around
I am beginning to talk out loud
Shut up!
Stop bugging me.
It is very annoying
But at least I know
I have been cleared of mental health issues
Despite his wife Rebeccas insistence
On sitting down and one more time
Stressing me out with her nonsense
I recall she was indicted twenty year ago
For showing up at different Kaisers
Insisting the patient was only imaging
Being ill with no real symptoms
But my mother died of brain cancer
Eighty percent of her brain was gone
And it was not from eating KFC.
I hope Xi enjoyed his indulgence
And even Putin had a chance
To get even with Americas sanctions
I still can not believe
I have to buy vodka
Made in Texas!
Really, Mr. Biden
On your next trip
Could you pick me up some contraband?
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