A man in Warwickshire
Says he unearthed solid gold.
With a metal detector
It has the initials of King Henry Viii
And Catherine of Aragon
Plus, the heart was an emblem.
On his horses livery
But what of these piece
Solid gold and in good condition
Just sitting under the first layer
On a barren field
Found four hundred years later?
Not likely.
Now if it was Jimmy....
We would know that.
He had pocketed it at the musuem
Just walked out the front door
With it in his pocket
And then when he went to pee.
He would drop it somewhere.
On the ground
And then jump up and down.
Screeching like a little girl.
Look what I found!
No one would believe him.
Not even my mother
Nor his mother either.
Everyone knows.
Stolen!
Some kind fools.
What? attempt to calm the situation
And take possession of the item.
In order to turn it over to the authorities
That would cause the screeching girl.
Great harm and his bearing
Would change in a flash.
Manic depressive
Is what it used to be called.
Now it is bipolar.
Two personalities
A high menthol one
And a low no nicotine one
Jimmy would not be able to stand.
His little device
Not working out.
He needed the idoit parents.
To believe him.
It would promptly disappear.
From whom ever took
The responisblity of returning it
And hide it amongs the belongings
Of someone else.
While he figured out how to get even
With the fool who did not know
What he wanted.
To be famous.
To be the owner
Of an artifact that
Would make him the king.
All jimmy has ever wanted.
Was to be the ruler.
Where he does nothing.
But eat. with his feet up
And plot out how to get.
Rid of his parents
Both sets of them.
This nice man turned.
The item over to the British musuem
They say it might not have been worn.
By King Henry
But presented by him.
As in a tournament contest.
Something to be cherished
Not tossed down on the ground
On the way home
From being at the capital
Where he got to meet and greet
The King himself
One never knows.
How these things show up
In the oddest places
If I would find something
I would know it was a fake
Because almost all of the fancy
Jewels in the tower
Or the vaults
Have now been replaced.
One due to the expensive wars
The monarchs were turning.
Their tiresome rocks
Into cash for themselves
While presenting the public
With plastic replicas
And two for security reasons
Those things on display
Are not really real.
Otherwise, some stupid kid
Might pocket one.
And walk out the door with it.
No, not the real things.
Are inside a vault.
That does not see daylight.
No Jimmies walking through.
Thier display desiring to make.
Himself king by simply pocketing.
An item of no value at all.
Like those gay lesbians
Wives of Elders
Who desire to have me told
I am not allowed to do anything
Without their permission
Which is nothing at all.
But it is quite illegal.
To have a third person in your marriage
That is why Maxwell is in prison.
And I intend to send.
Anne Marie F and Debbie B
To the gallows from them
Husbands giving them permission.
To entertain ideas of being a queen.
That is another story.
How a religions inner circle
Is not aware of the outer ones.
Desire to usurp.
Their authority
By assigning themselves
Superior positions
While the ones upstairs
Are unaware of how much.
Of their lives are worthless
Just a pendent on a label
Due to the corruptiveness
Of these new combers
Who can't keep their hands off?
Other people's lives and bodies.
Secret keys of the kingdom
Are not meant for everyone.
To own as they might
Cause something
Catastrophic to occur.
Kind of like. the modern
Footballs the Presidents
Walk around with under their arm.
A nuclear bomb waiting to go off
If someone steps on their foot
Or gets in the way of their daughter.
They will stop midstride.
And open up the suitcase.
Flip a switch and push a button.
There take that!
Holy hell.
The world gone boom.
Just because someone had a bad day.
That is why Candace.
Is not allowed to enter their property.
Not as a well-meaning aunt
Nor as a housekeeper
She will just sit down.
And begin to play with her new toy.
Who cares who gets hurt?
She already has an agreement.
With Satan to survive anything.
Of course, if he does not survive.
Then she will be in hell!
Sunday school again.
Keys of the kingdom
Refer to the ones Jesus
Gave to his apostles.
In a lecture about the future
Although it is Peter
Who? is supposed to have inherited them.
The least spoken of one of them all.
So quiet that we only know that he had red hair.
A temper and was bold when he got mad.
Whereas John was a cousin of Christ
And always present at his side.
But the Lucifer of Judas
Just kept wearing everyone down
Over finances.
Worry, worry over his funds!
He held the treasure chest.
And kept counting it out.
Wonder who much they were allowed.
To spend on the last supper?
A donkey ride through town
Palms for everyone instead of flowers
An upper private chamber
Relaxed cushions to recline.
Good food and wine
He must have really been.
Delirious when they were done.
All that money!
And on a annual supper
To be held for Passover
Which included lamb and greens!
No wonder he ran off
To the High Priests
Thirty pieces of silver
To replenish all his coins
Spent on that one dinner.
Does one have to wonder?
What happened next??
He sold his own golden goose.
What was he thinking?
They just wanted to question him.
No they arrest him and execute him.
No more little coins for his palm
Do you wonder that he might?
Have thrown himself off a cliff.
With a rope around his neck?
Jimmy used to pull that stunt.
All the time and survive
Thre he is again
Swinging from a tree or streetlight.
No broken neck!
Must have a pact with the Devil!
Anyway, I am more to the idea.
That one of the others
Had enough of his counting
And misering
Never allowing them to enjoy themselves.
Having to walk everywhere
Jesus even had to turn stones into fish.
Or something like that.
Really, heave hoe
Crash!
Tinkle all those little coins.
Something like that might have occurred
In old England.
A new item of joy.
Stolen or thrown away.
Got all the way home
And could not show the wife
What he had earned!
A 24 carat gold necklace
With a jeweled heart!
They could have afforded a trip.
To the Bahamas.
They were taking on tourist
To this new spot.
Imagine getting there.
The wife might not have wanted to come home.
All the way across the Atlantic to the new Americas!
The police say we are not allowed
To go inside our own houses.
It is thought by grandpa
That Jimmy has hidden something
In one of them and cant remember
Which one.
So we are not allwoed to go into
Any of them?
How many times has he pulled this
On your family?
One of these days he will be stopped.
Not before he has torn down
Hundred year old houses.
Just because Candace has to have access
To everything for herself to admire.
He has not been inside.
The White House, has he?
Oh no! He has....
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